Costume Malfunction Chronicles - Episode 1

I have been dancing for 9 years now. In those 9 years I have experienced SEVERAL minor and embarassing costume malfunctions. In this series I will chroncile my multiple moments of embarassing costume mishaps.What's the point in embarassing yourself if you can't share it with friends?

My first costume malfunction came after I had been dancing for 2 years. I was 21 years old. It was at a student hafla that my teacher Linda was putting on. I had my first solo! I couldn't believe it! I was SOO nervous. I had this beautiful turkish costume. It was a black skirt with embroidery, a vest and a hip scarf. I chose to dance to an upbeat Algerian piece of music.

I considered myself to be quite the little seamstress at the time. So I made the black crushed velt choli top that I was planning on wearing for the show. It wans't the tie back style as I didn't want the bulk with the ties. So it criss crossed in the front of the top.

My dad, whom I hadn't spoken to in years, decided to come out to the show with his then girlfriend. My brother was there as well. And one of my mentors, Sahfi. I was so excited and proud to get up and dance. I started on stage (The picture to the left is from the performance). As I was dancing with all of the passion I could muster, I started to notice my top creeping open in the front. It opened a bit more. And then a bit MORE! And then I started think. OMG. My shirt is stretching while I am dancing.

I hadn't put any elastic on the neckline to keep it closed and stretch velvet stretches as you move in it! So holy shit, here I am dancing in front of my DAD and BROTHER and my tits are about to fall out of my shirt! To make matters worse (lord knows what possessed me to make such a stupid mistake), I wasn't WEARING A BRA!

I didn't know what to do. I had to keep dancing....the show must go on! But I didn't want to show my berries to the audience, least of all my dad. Luckily I had a moment of brilliance to help erase the several moments of previous stupidity and I spun around to the back, tucked my tits into my shirt, pulled the top closed and turned back around in the blink of an eye. What a pro! I finished the number without incident, took my bows and walked off stage.

However....embarassing moments came afterwards...."Hey, you dance pretty good, but I thought your tits were going to come out of your top." was really all I heard all night. Haha.

Lesson: Always wear a BRA in performance! Even if you belong to the itty bitty titty club. AND, always secure necklines with elastic.